The Summer Wind...

Little Dorrit approached me as I came home yesterday, the day's post in my hand. It was early evening and Little Dorrit was adamant that we should go for a walk. She is transitioning through the stages of Alzheimer's. She has little or no short term memory. She has recently lost access to her long term memory. She is unable to care properly for her personal hygiene, or laundry, or cooking. Despite this, Little Dorrit and I remain loving neighbors. She is one of the seniors who lives nearby. Little Dorrit and I get along quite well thus far. It makes her giggle when I do my happy dance, and make up words to songs. Her lack of short term memory becomes a blessing, as she soon forgets my lack of dance ability, or that I am tone deaf. As far as Little Dorrit is concerned, I am a really big star, newly arrived from touring the Orpheum Circuit. At least, that's how I feel when I am with her.

So, when she tugged on my arm, and wouldn't let go. I agreed to go for a walk. She and I walk down the lane and back, then we sit on a bench if there is shade. Her memory loss means that each walk is experienced anew! Every tree is a first tree. Every bird, cloud, patch of sky, or wild flower has been newly created just for us.

I was feeling sad last night, so when Little Dorrit found me, it was like being touched by an angel. As we sat on our bench, I decided to make up a song. "I'll sing the first verse, then you sing the second." I prompted. Little Dorrit said, "I don't know any songs." I smiled and said, "That's okay. We'll make it up. I'll start. Make your pappy happy!" Then, I waited holding my breath. I wasn't at all sure what would happen.

Little Dorrit sang out, smiling, "And you had better make it snappy! So, he won't feel so crappy! Then, he won't get the strappy!" I clapped, and clapped. Little Dorrit and I roared with laughter. "That was absolutely wonderful!" I exclaimed joyfully. "Let's make up a song." I said. "I don't know any songs!" Little Dorrit answered. "That's okay. We'll make it up. I'll start, then point to you, and you can make up the next line. Okay. I'll start. Make your pappy happy!" I pointed to Little Dorrit.

She sang out, "You'd better make it snappy. So, he won't feel so crappy. And he won't get the strappy!"

I added, "Make your pappy happy, with Poppenfeld!" Little Dorrit and I roared with delight. For one hour and a half, we sat on that bench and sang that song as if newly written each time. Then, tired out from singing, we stared at the trees growing on the rock face in front of us. A bluebird landed by our feet and pushed his beak repeatedly into the ground. "He must be looking for something good to eat to feed his babies in the nest. I think he lives in that rock somewhere." Little Dorrit observed out loud. I agreed with her. And, I agreed each time she came to the same conclusion.

The repetition of her statements became a comforting prayer, as if God were using her as His instrument to deliver His message of being present in the eternal Now. It is as if God were reminding me of the unique beauty of each ineffable moment.

I looked into Little Dorrit's eyes, and I said, "I'll miss you." She looked at me with child-like wonder and said, "Where are you going?" I smiled again. "If ever I move." Then, wisdom spoke! Little Dorrit turned to me, leaning in and said, "You're here. This is where you live right now! You're not going to find any place better than this place is right now. You have neighbors that you know and care about. This is where you live. This is your home." Flabbergasted, I stared into Little Dorrit's eyes. Then, just as suddenly Wisdom faded somewhere deep inside. But, it had made itself heard, and felt. We sat on the bench as the summer wind blew, ever so gently.

We sat in silence as the sun began its descent. Gold became dark orange, which in turn became lavender blue.

"Let's go home." I said to Little Dorrit. "Okay!" She smiled.

"Are angels self-aware?" I wondered to myself, as Little Dorrit spread her wings, and we skipped all the way back home.

Love in The Afternoon...

It is so hot today the squirrels are sprawled out across the branches, and cannot be bothered to look up as I walk by. Ray, the mail man, humorously told me he left something special by my door. It is a running joke between us. I keep telling him my wish is to receive a package. "What would be in it?" Ray asked one day. "It is a mythical package. It would be the one package that solves everything, and opens all doors." I answered. "I'll keep my eye out for that package for you." Ray promised. We both laughed. "Did you ever see Willy Wonka and the Chocolate factory?" I asked. "Now that you mention it, you remind me of that kid. What was his name?" Ray asked. "His name was Charlie." I answered. "A Golden ticket!" Ray exclaimed. "That's what you're waiting for!" We both kept laughing as he continued on his route. "It's too hot to go for a walk today! Go inside. I left you that package!" Ray called out. I chased after his mail truck. He smiled mischievously.

Ray was correct to advise me against a walk today. It is over one hundred degrees. I stood under the shade of a tree. The squirrels eyed me, as if to say, "We approve. Stay close to us. We are wise enough to know the way."

My neighbor and her daughter-in-law strolled by in matching sunglasses and parasols. I waved excitedly, hopping up and down. The squirrels did not approve of the hopping.

The Whistle-Stop express pulled up. It was Mike, of the bushy moustache! We both were filled with such glee to see each other. "I must tell you a story!" He called out from the driver's seat. "What?" I asked. "I built a special canoe with three seats for my dogs." He said. "You have three dogs? That's wonderful." I cheered.

"Wait. I haven't told you the best part." Mike continued speaking in his best storyteller's voice. "We went up to the lake, the dogs and I. They love the water. I can't keep them out. They jumped off the canoe, making it tip over. We all four fell into the lake!" Mike and I grinned open-mouthed. "There were a few men fishing by the shore. They laughed at us. Then, the men clapped, and yelled for us to do it again. But, my dogs and I didn't care. We were happy, and were enjoying the day."

Mike drove the Whistle-Stop express away. He promised to mail a photo of his dogs. "Be good!" His voice in the distance, beckoned.

Oh, dear reader, I feel so blessed to have you as part of my family, and to be able to share stories of love, laughter, and light.

I walked a bit, and sat on a stone bench. One lone squirrel called out, "Never go against the current of the river! Do not fight against the sun! Hot day, seek shade!" "That squirrel must be a Zen master." I thought to myself. But, I listened to his sage advice and came back in, to write this letter to you, my most bosom companion.

Friedrich von Schiller once wrote, "Our own heart, and not others' opinions of us, forms our true honor."

As I post this note to you, I feel only gratitude.

The Call To Bloom...

In the old miners park, where they would pan for gold, there is a cave called Priest's Cave. The miners had no house of worship, living along the creek bed in makeshift tents. I sat in the brown silent hollowed-out stone. It is a small cave, barely enough room for three people. But, it does provide shade from heat, and shelter from rain, and perhaps just as importantly, a sense of privacy. I imagined the miners' need for spiritual nourishment. It must have been an overwhelming need indeed to inspire them to seek out a holy man in a tiny cave.

It is summer here in the wilderness. Triple digit heat. Oppressive heat. In hot desert places, water is life. And, the thirst for water becomes all consuming. In this park, there are many signs that read, "Beware of mountain lions." On the long walk home through the woods, I feared lions on the prowl. I suppose it takes great courage to have the single-minded devotion to seek out our heart's desire, no matter the obstacle.

I saw my sixty-something family doctor walking bare-chested, in boxer shorts and Birkenstock sandals, his long-haired greyhound on a leash leading the way. My doctor's wife, a strong looking Viking woman, walked by their side. I passed their house in the historic district. It is difficult not to feel familial affection for all the residents of the town. It is such an intimate setting. We bump into each other at market, on Main Street, in medical offices. News travels quickly in small communities. We know who is ill at any given moment. We know who to pray for. We know who to celebrate. Neighbor to neighbor, the word is spread.

When someone dies here, the loss is keenly felt because we know one another, or of one another. Such and such just became a grandfather. The lady in the bonnet won first prize for her jam. "Oh, that one, he is destined for greatness!" On corners, in tea shops, at fruit and vegetable stands, people talk. Men and women stop to greet each other. People actually smile, and bow their heads, as they say, "Good day to you." Men tip hats. Women walk with confidence. There is a sense of comfort and safety.

Long, long ago, Charlie Rosenthal was the first Rabbi I ever met. He had a red Afro, and a thick red beard. He was kind, and quick to joke. I remember he invited me to join his youth group to attend a lecture being given by Elie Wiesel. The auditorium was packed with people of all races, and cultures. Mr. Wiesel spoke of healing, forgiveness, redemption, peace, and hope. We in the audience were deeply moved by the wise soft-spoken man. Years earlier, as a child of thirteen, I heard Pope John Paul ll speak at Madison Square Garden in New York. It was that same feeling. Immediately, in the moment after hearing both these men speak, I dared believe in a land where peace, and hope prevailed. But, throughout my life in the boogie-down ghettos, I never found that mystical land. That is to say, not until now.

Though I remain a sojourner, God has led me, however briefly, however long, to a desert respite. When we choose the road less traveled, we never know where that road will lead us. When I met my doctor on the road, he stopped to speak to me in earnest. He suggested that God may be preparing me for movement. "It is not about staying, or going. It is about growing!" A loving nurse once told me as she took a blood sample. So, the movement that my doctor was alluding to may be a physical move, or simply spiritual growth. But, for however long I remain planted here, I bloom.

How can one help but bloom, among the flowers of the wild?

The Love We Share...

Albert, one of the bus drivers of the Whistle Stop Express, gave me the change to board, as I did not have any coins today. I was so overjoyed at his loving generosity that I failed to realize the van was headed in the opposite direction I needed to go. So, Albert paused and calmly told me not to worry. He called the next Whistle Stop van due to arrive and asked them to wait for me, explaining that I had paid my fare. "Here, show this to the next driver." Albert gave me his handwritten note. I thanked him, and made a mental note to ask him for his recipe for egg salad sandwiches, and zucchini bread. The drivers of the Whistle Stop are all so kind and patient, and giving of themselves.

Main Street was bright with sunshine, and a cool breeze kept it comfortable. Having been placed on a strict diet due to health reasons, I have not had a hot dog to eat in months. But, today, I made up my mind to indulge myself. Joan and Judy, who own the tiny food stall, greeted me. "What would you like?" Judy asked. Joan and Judy work hard, six days a week, in the grueling summer heat, and icy winter cold. In their spare time, they feed the homeless, though they are too humble to admit this. But, I have seen them. Strong, tough, hard as rock on the outside, but tender-hearted on the inside. I could not make up my mind what to order. Joan waited patiently by the grill. "Okay, I would like a...hot dog!" I exclaimed. "Wonderful. And, what would you like on that?" Judy asked. "Mustard, ketchup, relish, guacamole, and sour cream!" I practically leaped in the air, I was so excited. Then, I added, "I would like a soda pop, in a glass, filled with ice." Judy told me to find somewhere to sit. "I'll bring it out to you when it's ready." She said.

There were many tourists in our town today. I was delighted to see them of course. The merchants work selflessly on behalf of others. Main Street merchants are deserving of our support. As Main Street goes, so goes the nation.

But, I wanted to eat in a quiet place. I found a nook just by the creek that runs through the center of town. Slender willows, and smooth river rocks surrounded me. I almost fell asleep to the gentle rustling of the leaves, and the sound of the rushing water. "I found you!" Judy smiled. She placed the deep fried hot dog piled high with condiments, guacamole and sour cream. She even remembered how much I enjoy drinking soda pop through a straw. "Here is a straw for you, and some napkins. Enjoy your little hiding place." She said. "No," I corrected her. "It's my healing place." I smiled too.

I enjoyed the meal immensely. Yes, I could taste the love that Joan and Judy put in to the preparation of it, in each bite I took. I thanked them as I walked by their stall. " I loved it!" I said with glee.

Thus fortified with childhood comfort food, I continued my walk down Main Street. I smiled at all the people that walked by. They smiled back. It was a perfectly loving way to begin the week.

My goal was the used book store. One of the Wise Women who owns and runs it had sent me a note last Friday. "I have a gift for you. Come." The note read.

As always, the used book store was packed with books and people. I waited until the faerie-clad Old Wise Woman had a free moment. "You told me to come and see you." I said. "Yes! this is a miniature book from my own private collection. It is for you." She said, and handed me the palm-sized treasure, knowing how much I love miniature books. It was a book on Man and Symbols of the Soul and Psyche. "Thank you, I love it!" I said. And, I meant it, having just finished The Ring of The Nibelung by Wagner. I needed to be reminded of the light once again. Wagner taught me that the object of our desire, whether it be hot dogs or rings of gold, if allowed to become all-consuming addictions can lead to our ultimate self-destruction. We must recognize when it is time to let go, and then have the strength to do it. In releasing the object of desire, we release ourselves from its power over us.

Another Wise Woman, the long dark haired one, began her belly dance, wiggling her hips, waving her arms in the air, stomping the floor with her right foot with such power and force that none of us in the shop could resist her non-verbal command to rise up and dance. We were the belly dancers, men and women, dancing in celebration of life! We ended the belly dance in a communal hug. The long dark haired Wise Woman sang out in gypsy tones, "Huggapalooza! It's a huggapalooza!" And, yes, it was.

The laughter and joy carried out into the street. Oh, dear reader, God is love!

At Portia's Request...

On Main Street, right next to a gallery of paintings of light, there is a kind-hearted woman who owns a small doll orphanage. There are dolls from floor to ceiling. Little boy and girl dolls in varied dress. Each doll is unique. Their eyes stare out at you with such emotion, almost as if saying, "Please, choose me." I looked at the dolls for a long time before the right one found me. He has a full head of hair, and a knowing look, but no smile. "Does he know a secret?" I wondered. "Perhaps he is sad because he is alone?" I thought to myself.

The orphanage is well-maintained. I could see that the dolls are loved, and treated with care, but the little fellow who called out to me was in need of family. I decided to adopt him. I told the shopkeeper that he would need new clothes, as he was wearing hand-me-downs. I purchased blue shorts, a white short sleeved shirt, and a striped school tie. On the adoption certificate I wrote his name, Paolo Alessandro. His father had been an Italian diplomat stationed in Shanghai. His mother had been a Chinese national. But, due to tragic events, Paolo was left utterly alone, that is until the apron attired shopkeeper saved him. "Promise me you will love him." She said. "I promise." I answered. "He is vanilla scented to help you bond with him."

I thanked her, and walked out of the doll orphanage, holding Paolo Alessandro close to me. He was slightly smaller than the other boy dolls. His clothes were two sizes too large. Perhaps that was the reason my heart went out to him. "He is so small." I thought. "He needs extra large doses of love to help him grow."

A letter came in the post today, from a beloved friend on the East Coast. In the letter, my friend asked me to consider signing a petition to create a September 11th National Holiday. Just the thought of that day is enough to make me cry. Is there anyone in our beloved country, perhaps even the world, who does not remember where they were on that day?! I wrote my friend back, and asked her to read a beautifully written book titled, The Day The World Came To Town by Jim Defede. It is the story of the kindness of strangers during hellish circumstances. In a time of fear, and hate, the citizens of Gander, Newfoundland responded with ineffable love to stranded Americans at the airport.

"The quality of Mercy is not strained." Shakespeare wrote. Meaning, we should be generous with mercy, allowing it to flow from ourselves freely. But, this is easy to say, or do during times of comfort and ease. Can we as fallible human beings rise to the call for Mercy during times of strife, and overwhelming suffering? Perhaps, it does indeed take a very special kind of Human Being to give and give and not count the cost?

How much physical strength does it take to forgive? How strong does one actually have to be to let go of past hurts. To what extent must Time pass before we can remember past pain without the sting?

I'm not sure I have any answers to these questions. I simply held the vanilla-scented doll in my arms, and breathed in, as I walked up the hill, headed for home.

The Visitor...

Yesterday, late afternoon, there was a knock on my door. I had just walked home from voting, and had changed into sweatpants. But, the knock on the door was different than any knock I had heard before. It got my attention. I opened the door.

There he was, the same man I had met on the road to the cobbler's shop just last week. He had come to see me. I asked him to wait a moment outside while I changed into proper outerwear. I met him in the communal outdoor area. He and I sat facing each other on picnic tables. He told me he had just had another surgery last week. That made a total of three surgeries in a twelve month period. He had had a stroke, then internal bleeding, and most recently a hernia. I sat there facing him. He told me he was seventy years old. "Seventy?" I asked incredulously. In his tank top tee-shirt, shorts, bronzed muscular arms and legs, he looked to be no older than forty-seven. "Many other men might not have survived one of your health issues and surgeries, let alone three." I said. "You are very blessed. Many people have been praying for you this past year." I added. "How do you know?" He asked as if testing me. "Your house of worship has a bulletin. I've seen your name in it under special intentions. And, I do believe in the palpable power of prayer. I call it, P.O. P. for short." I smiled.

"P.O.P.?" He smiled too. As he sat there sharing his journey with me, I wondered what had possessed him to make the long walk from his home to mine, especially since he was still in the process of recovering from his hernia surgery. "Is it safe for you to walk?" I asked. "My wife is worried about it. But, my doctor said it is okay to go for short walks. This is my outing, my visit to you." He said. Half his body was still partially paralyzed from the stroke. His arm was in a cast of some sort, to keep his hand and fingers from curling inward. His speech was slurred. He spoke slowly, deliberately.

Had God inspired this man to seek me out? If so, why? Who am I? Dearest reader, you should know that I am the town fool, an object of scorn and ridicule. But, this man, who sat opposite me, is a man of importance, wealth, power, prestige, and position. As I sat there listening, I thought of a little boy who lives far away. He lives with autism. His mother writes to me about his journey in life. That little boy quickly became one of my heroes. He told his mother that sometimes he hates living with autism. She held him as he cried. Maybe, that's what life is about, taking turns comforting one another? That little boy taught me a very grown-up lesson in empathy. So, maybe that was what this man sitting opposite me was seeking, shared empathy?

Rabbi Harold S. Kushner is spiritually correct when he writes that sometimes bad things happen to good people. It is how we choose to respond to the changed circumstances in our bodies and in our lives that can help us move forward into the light, or keep us stuck in pain-filled darkness.

Of course, we mourn the loss of who we once were. And the mourning process is often re-visited throughout our changed lives. There may be things we simply will no longer be able to do. But, then there are things we can do.

This seventy year old man was a champion wind-surfer just three years ago. He lamented the loss of his wind-surfing days. I told him that he was still a champion, just a different kind of champion.

I walked him half-way back to his house high on the hill. Even post-stroke, he was still in better physical shape than I. He had barely worked up a sweat, while I was doubled over, out of breath!

A big dog came up to my neighbor. The dog smiled and nuzzled him. "Do you know this dog?" I asked, amazed at their bond. 'No, we're just good friends. We meet every so often by the side of the road."

God is love.

Sunshine on Main Street

The Farmer's Market was alive with flowers, produce, live fiddle music, and people. Love was in the air, as neighbors hugged one another, all smiles and laughter. Everything was beautiful this June morning, as I walked over the cross bridge to the town center. The merchants were just opening their shops. "Hello!" They greeted me as I passed. "Are you on your way to the market?" They asked. "Yes, I had better hurry, but I'll come back on the way home. I promise." Skipping was easier than walking. Singing came more naturally than talking. Love was indeed in the air, and this morning's Main Street became a stage-theater musical.

By the time I arrived at the market, the farmers had their white canopies up to protect them from the summer heat. Grand Pa was in his seat as usual sharing stories. Grand Pa is every one's grand father, beloved by all. Adults, from near and far, eagerly listen by his feet. Grand Pa sells trees and plants that he grows in his home nursery. Mama Carol and Papa Glenn, in the next door stall, sell vegetable-plants, and flowers. Yes, Carol is loving mother, and Glenn is doting father to all men, women, and children. In fact, the entire Farmer's Market feels like holiday homecoming, every Saturday morning!

After a half hour's visit, I hugged the hard working farmers tightly. "Good-bye!" I waved. "Good-bye, little one!" They waved back.

True to my promise, I made my way back by way of Main Street. Merchants came out to greet me, as I walked by. "Don't forget to eat something!" They smiled. "What should I eat?" I asked, suddenly realizing that I was hungry. "Go see Joan and Judy! They will fix you something good."

I listened to their suggestion. Joan and Judy had been watching and listening as I walked up the sidewalk. By the time, I arrived at their food stall, they were ready for me with a big plate of shredded beef roast on a bed of cool crisp lettuce and fresh sour cream. As I sat by the fountain, listening to the cascading water, Judy brought me an old-fashioned soda in a glass of crushed ice. I could taste the love in each bite of the food they had prepared, so much so, I asked for seconds!

Newly fortified, I sought the used bookstore for a brief respite from the midday sun. The stacks of books provided shade and inspiration. All the lovely books called out, "Read me!" The Wise Women of the bookstore asked me for books on tea. "Yes, I have many such books. I shall bring some in next time I visit." I answered.

Now, it was time to climb the gently sloping hill home. Two tourists were lost as I crossed the street. I offered directions. They stared at me for a moment, perplexed. I understood their confusion, so I explained, "This is a village. We're all related, and we help each other."

"Do you live here?" The husband and wife asked. I smiled, and replied, "Yes."

The creek giggled with glee, ever so slightly, as I walked over the cross bridge. Destination; home.